The Mueller Report. A Heroic Ode for The American Resistance

Heroic Ode for The American Resistance

for CNN, MSNBC, The New York Times & all those

who hoped the Mueller report would be the thing

Rather than fight the man-child from Orange

on the metres deep concrete of his actual crimes,

you did battle with your size twelve dress shoes 

gallantly planted in quicksand – just now grown suddenly

ravenous – or failing that in the largest serving 

of Jell-O and ice cream since Christopher Columbus 

showed up to tell America he’d discovered it.

Given the chance you’d have stood pluckily before the jury

and – neglecting to mention the shortcomings 

in his approach to childcare –accused

Josef Fritzel of bad carpentry; courageously focussed

on Elizabeth the First’s bald patch and not her public 

disembowelling of her critics; fearlessly 

taken issue with Peter Sutcliffe’s driving

and not what he did to those women

with his menu of hammers and screwdrivers;

dared take to a radio talk show to criticise the late Adolf Hitler

for his side parting and inability to gather a crowd,

and told the plebs it’s time Franz von Papen rode to their rescue.

You who heroically blew the bags of Dollars mom and dad invested

putting big ideas into your little skull by trying to convict this wolf

temporarily taken human form of eating the one sheep he didn’t.

© Kevin Higgins

Special Counsel Robert Mueller's Report Is Reportedly More Than 300 Pages Long

Kevin Higgins 

Kevin is co-organiser of Over The Edge literary events in Galway, Ireland. He teaches poetry workshops at Galway Arts Centre, Creative Writing at Galway Technical Institute, and is Creative Writing Director for the National University of Ireland - Galway Summer School. He is poetry critic of The Galway Advertiser. He has published five collections of poetry. His next poetry collection, Sex and Death at Merlin Park Hospital, will be published by Salmon Poetry in June 2019.