Loud and Aggressive Women

I am a nurse. Despite the fact that many men now choose nursing as an occupation it continues to be a female dominated profession. Even if it were to become male dominated I doubt much would change because it is the nature of nursing as 'caring, nurturing and healing " work that relegates it to the bottom of the health care hierarchy in terms of our power and influence as workers.
In most ways nursing replicates to large degree the role of women in the family and society in general. We are always there 24 hours a day. We in effect run hospitals and clinics. In the wee hours of the night when other disciplines are sleeping, we make decisions, our competence saves lives , and our patients receive comfort.
We`are taken for granted and despite the team concept we know in our hearts and minds that we have no input into the "big decisions" despite the show of asking for our input. This is old news and despite claims that nursing as a "profession' has come a long way-we know better really. When the budgets are cut , when pharmacists and social workers are laid off along side us-work is off loaded onto us without consultation and we are expected not to object.
We are stereotyped and objectified in pornography which has always been a mystery to me-sore and swollen feet, aching backs even among the youngest of us-how is this sexy?
We laugh a lot at these stereotypes -what else can we do. Nurses in general have a tremendous sense of collective experience and struggle, partly because we share oppression and partly because we need each other more than we need any other discipline except for the support staff,the cleaners and dietary workers. Our solidarity rests in the main among ourselves and with these workers.We know that the million dollar a year heart surgeon's work is worth nothing as soon as the patient is rolled out of the operating room into a bed and the physician goes off to his golf game.It is no wonder that support workers like nurses the best. We actually see them and acknowledge them and thank them for their work. We even know their names . Their work is even more invisible and thankless than ours . But we know we need them more than they need us.
Just like in the world where women are portrayed as and expected to be "either "virgin or whore," gentle and kind or manipulative and threatening , supportive or subversive, wives and mothers or mistresses, nurses are portrayed in pornography as sexy , sometimes sadistic temptresses or quiet and submissive,never tiring angels of mercy and comfort. In some cultures women bear the burden of "family honour" and for this we are stoned and killed , sometimes by our own fathers and brothers. We are revered and honoured as mothers and reviled when we take control of bodies and act on our reproductive rights to abortion and safe birth control.
A few weeks ago I was called into my bosses office and accused of being 'loud and aggressive to "external disciplines." 'Because I am a union steward and a vocal one at that I was told that I must get my Local president to come to fact-finding meeting with me. We tag teamed the manager and the director of services 3 on 3 and they were forced to back off. They could not support their claims. Three weeks later I had to submit to a annual performance appraisal. I sat with the same manager as we went through my work . Overall it was a very good appraisal until it came to the section on communication skills. Unable to discipline me weeks earlier she added to my evaluation that I was "loud and aggressive." She backdoored the intimidation attempted earlier into a document that I must sign , cannot grieve and can only write a rebuttal.
Now I have worked for almost 40 years. I am not building a career,and have no fears of these unfounded claims based soley on my work as a union steward , my confidence and assertiveness in bebunking the team concept and fighting for the rights of my co-workers . But i cannot help but marvel at the language they used. LOUD and AGGRESSIVE - to external disciplines. Cheap sexist shots.
I cannot wonder if they thought that because I am woman in a female dominated profession if I would feel shame and fear at the use of these terms.
Unable to find fault with my practice, unable to locate criticism among my fellow nurses and co-workers, cleaners and dietary workers, their escalating corporate thrust required that they try to "tame" me. I have to laugh though at the innate sexist assumptions within their description of my behaviour. At the same time I am afraid for younger women in my occupation who may not yet have developed the confidence and assertiveness life and work has forced me to develop.
The reality is much as it has been for women throughout time. LOUD? women are to be silenced and subdued. Assertive women are "aggressive" and must be tamed.
I have yet to sign my performance appraisal-yet to take the time to come up with a rebuttal, yet to find a way to force my union leadershio to generalize my experience and harassment-to make a point and fight back for us all.
I guess this may be in part because I am too busy fighting loudly and aggressively.
Damn their attempts to tame me and subdue me.