"If you get hit by a bus tomorrow, you should be fine"

(right) EVERYONE GET OUTTA THE WAY
. . . or Keanu Reeves will take the wheel!

It's the begining of the month. In my unemployed condition, and with October closing, so too my union-paid health benefits have ended for my family of four.

Contacting my so-called Health Provider about getting my federally subsidized health benefits under the Cobra plan has been a quagmire of busy signals and paper chases.

Finally, today, I began my hike down to the benefits office. On the way I got a bit of a shock. A human being at the benefits office picked up the phone. As I paced forward on my cell phone, carefully crossing roads in the my pursuit to get to the person on the other end of the phone in person, I was informed that their was a hitch in my application for Cobra benefits.

"Oh its just a small error" the helpful lady informed me. "Fine. But do I currently have health benefits or not?" I asked. "I mean if this bus coming down the road hits me, will I be covered?" Her answer was swift, abrupt and painful, "No!" She softened the blow by adding, "if you come down and fix the mistake in the form today then if you get hit by a bus tomorrow, you should be fine."

Well, in my normal employed life, I always tried to avoid being hit by a bus. Now I will have to be more vigilant. Because if I don't have healthcare coverage and I get hit by a bus, well the bus may as well drive straight into my house, because no doubt the doctors bill would rule out being able to afford continuing to "own" our home.

Mmmm. Capitalism. It's just the best.

Rob, unemployed, Oakland, California