Unemployed. Being There.

After 12 years of riding the high-rise construction boom in San Francisco, without hardly any time off, I am now unemployed.
It’s a big change. To be doing nothing. Not to get up at 4.30 and drive the bridge into the city. I feel like one of those cartoon characters that high speed runs off the cliff and just keeps going even though there’s nothing below. If I was to stop and look down – I’d see the possibility of losing our house and, far worse, of losing my children’s health benefits.
Last night at my union meeting I found out that I am #396 on the carpenters out of work list and that only 6 jobs came in this past week. 6 jobs. That means I should get a job before 2011.
I don’t know if its because I talk about it – I mention the unmentionable – that I am “unemployed” but others have started to share that they are also unemployed. The job-full (not the jobless) seem to greet the news of my unemployment universally, in the same way, “Oh, I’m so sorry.:” Like I’ve lost a family member. I don’t know if its an awkward sign of solidarity or if its people not being used to talking about it.
My neighbor is practically unemployed. He’s a self-employed floor finisher that hasn’t had work in along time. He got a call from a contractor if he didn’t lower his price on an agreed bid that he’d give the job to someone else. I said, “did you tell him to f*** off?” He said, “No, I need the work, man.”
A comrade in the local LMV branch here has had a dozen interviews she’s nearing her benefits limit. My sister in law is in the same boat, 3 weeks away from her 6-months limitl. Another comrade’s son, a plumber, was put on a mandatory part-time basis before being told there’s no work at all, same as me.
I passingly joked about having another 7-day weekend to a friend who’s husband’s job was tenuous. She said that her husband was fired that day. It was shocking. I had this mini-panic attack, like “Oh shit, the whole world is falling apart.”
Then I got mad.
What a truly f****d up society. Capitalism. It claims to be the best. Like an abusive husband or a tyrannical father, it is only the best until you get the courage to look it in the face.
I am one in 11,606,000. Eleven million people who get up, have coffee and look out the window as workers file by on their way to work to be productive.
I will be productive. If you live in the bay area and want my help fighting against this system: if you’re fighting an eviction, a foreclosure or getting screwed elsewise, I will work with you to fight. Call me. My cell is 510 220 3047 and my name is Rob and I am unemployed.